I opened WhatsApp like any other time and navigated to the status section, as all I was looking for was some distraction, not to reply to a message or message anyone.

I checked a few statuses and came upon one that was, at first, unbelievable: it noted RIP on Professor Salau’s picture. I quickly went to the next to see what my friend had uploaded again, as I was in disbelief of the first. The next was a eulogy. It made no sense, so I went back to the first status and read it again, and then back to the eulogy to be certain I was reading it right. It appeared I was reading it right, but it was still very hard to believe.

I have another friend, Olaitan, who is very close to Prof. and I could rely on him to confirm or disconfirm what I’d seen. Alas, on his status as well was the same RIP post. How could Prof. be dead? Why would he be dead? When did he die? How did he die?

I went to OAU. I didn’t take Prof. Salawu’s course until 300L, Public Sector Accounting. But from 100L I had known him, as he was the Head Pastor of the fellowship I attended, Deeper Life Campus Fellowship. Beyond that, because Olaitan is my friend, and he doubled, in some way, as Prof’s PA, I was often in Prof’s office helping with one thing or another with him, or sometimes just using the space to read. 

So he was my pastor, my professor, my course administrator, an example – in a very specific way. The last time I heard about him from Olaitan, it was news of good tidings and all. So what do you all mean to post his picture and note RIP on it? 

Olaitan confirmed that he was indeed dead. As I type this, I still wonder what I am typing and what I mean by “he was indeed dead”.

Okay, so what happened and what were the circumstances surrounding his death? 

Olaitan: “He just slumped o.”

Stop it! He slumped and died?! 

Earlier this year in April, I slumped in my house as well. The experience was real to me and a reality check, as I was, for a second or so, not sure how I landed on the passage floor of my house. In my diary, I reflected on the experience and wrote the following:

Death is a topic I’ve reflected on many times. And my view is summarised in the following bullets.

  • For the person who dies, what is left on earth is pointless. The pain, the adulation, the remembrance, the good words, the jubilation mean nothing to them. They are gone, unconnected with what’s left of earth and they can finally leave the daily struggles of earth alone. 
  • You are more likely to be alive tomorrow if you are alive today. And although people die daily [165,000 people are estimated to die daily, globally], it’s so evenly distributed that we only rarely see death around us. So the probability of you being alive tomorrow and living longer is higher than the probability of you dying today or tomorrow. 
  • When death eventually catches up with you, it will be like “any ordinary day.” It won’t matter that you have much more to do, much more to give, much more to accomplish. It won’t matter that you thought since you are alive today you are also more likely to be alive tomorrow. It will come and you won’t be able to resist it. You will be gone within the twinkle of an eye.

For Professor Salawu, he’s had his “any ordinary day” and he is now no longer with us. I feel heartbroken. I also know that death is the end of us all and we can’t change that. May his soul rest in peace. And I hope to see him again in the presence of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Saviour.

Two weeks after my slumping experience, I opened my journal again, reflecting on the subject of death, our finality. In it I wrote, “We all die. Setting that [fact] as a baseline for one’s life materially alters what we do and how we do it.” A few ways this has influenced me:

  1. It is tempting to resort to passivity in the face of the reality of “hmm, we will all die in the end so what’s the point?” What I have taken up instead is what Solomon concluded in Ecclesiastes: work, eat and enjoy what you may, for it is the gift of God. ‭‭Ecclesiastes‬ ‭3‬:‭12‬-‭13‬ (‭NIV). 
  2. Detachment. Setting the reality of death as a baseline also helps, in a material way, with detachment: when you lose a thing, you don’t crash; when you are offended, forgiveness is easy, etc. You have come to earth with nothing and will return with nothing. Attachments to anything are so pointless. More importantly, attachment to anything to the point of saying “losing this is the end of my life” becomes obvious as an idol in your heart. 
  3. Purpose. This reality also pushes you to search for “the point of it all.” And when you find it, you will move with gusto, as I now do, since I found my purpose in Jesus: to please Him. The thing about coming close to death, or some other form of pain, is that it forces you to ask the existential questions, confront hard truths, and then loosen your grip on the life you thought was yours. As C. S. Lewis puts it, “As long as what we call ‘our own life’ remains agreeable we will not surrender it to [God].” Pain, near-death experiences, any ordinary day experiences, all make us consider God, some towards abandoning God, others towards accepting God. But you would have at least been awakened and forced to consider the existential questions. 

I hope you aren’t too afraid to think about death. You shouldn’t be. And when you do, I hope it changes you for the better.